The Root of Anger

By Blair McCosker

Many people would readily concur that our lives often feel like pressure-packed cans. To the best of our abilities we absorb the pressures of life and compress our emotions. However, often we feel like we are constantly living on the edge of our nerves. As the demands and pressures of life continue to come, something becomes a trigger and we explode! In many instances, we find ourselves doing and saying things that completely surprise us, and sometimes shock us. Suddenly, all of our inner turmoil, anxieties, and frustrations burst forth. We become angry!    

There could be many different sources of pressure in our lives, and potential triggers for our anger. It could be a looming stressful event, a troubled loved one, a rude customer, a grumpy boss, a whinging child, or perhaps the driver with the caravan who goes just too slow for us on our way to work. The danger is thinking that the source of the pressure is to blame for our response to it. All too often we find ourselves thinking “if they had not done that to me, I would never have responded in such a rude and angry way”. Such a statement quickly leads to a devastating deception.

We read in the book of Proverbs, ‘A fool always loses his temper, but a wise man holds it back’. Prov 29:11. If we become angry, we have chosen to do so. In real terms, no one else is to blame for our anger. It is the evidence of an unresolved attitude residing just under the surface of our lives. For the most part, we keep our composure. And yet, when we are scratched the right way, all is revealed! I once read the following quote: ‘The circumstances of life, the events of life, and the people around me in life, do not make me the way I am. They reveal the way I am’. How true? Pressure reveals what resides inside of each one of us. Anger is the symptomatic fruit of hurts and attitudes that reside deep within our being.

In seeking to deal with our anger, we must consider that a plant is never killed by simply cutting off its fruit. The sure way to kill it is by pulling it out, exposing and killing its root system. Quite often, the root system of our anger is firmly established in our fears and anxieties. These may be unspoken fears, and yet they reside deeply within us. Maybe it’s a fear of loss, a fear of failure or rejection, a fear of how others view us, or simply the fear of the unknown? For others, the root of anger may be different again. However, if you struggle with anger, ask God to reveal the unseen root system to you. Talk to someone, not just for temporary relief, but help with identifying and dealing  with the root cause of anger.